Bad on Purpose
Getting fresh with some cream
As I have mentioned in previous newsletters, shit’s getting crazy out there. Supply chains are messed up leaving gaps on the grocery shelves, and even when you can find things the grocery bill is higher than ever.
Dairy products, and especially specialty dairy products, were spendy to start with. A carton of 750g grams of yogurt can easily tip $5 at your local mega mart and niche products like quark and paneer were already a trip to the bougie grocery store or the specialty shop. It’s enough to discourage most people from trying a new recipe.
“I can’t buy that here. I guess I’ll make something else.”
Cultured dairy though, isn’t really that complicated: milk products + bacterial cultures. And what we get as yogurt from the mega mart is only the tip of the iceberg: there’s more than one bacteria that’s happy to ferment your milk. Folks in places like Scandinavia enjoy things like viili and filmjölk and there are really no equivalents in North American stores, much to my extreme irritation. The options we have in Canada are pretty lame in fact - it’s only when a product catches on south of the border (think Greek yogurt) that our dairy producers get on board.
But there is one very delicious (and useful) cultured dairy product you can make at home with regular ingredients from a regular store. And even better? You can make it without fussing about temperature and without even measuring.
Crème fraîche is the bomb.
As its name suggests, crème fraîche is originally French, though every culture that keeps cows has some kind of soured dairy preparation, though to even call it a “preparation” is almost to overthink it: leave fresh cream at room temperature, let it get sour.
Now, if we were to leave our store-bought milk or cream at room temperature, we know what would happen. The milk we buy at the mega mart is pasteurized (thank Louis Pasteur for lending the name), and thus deprived of its natural bacterial content by a quick heating and cooling process. Instead of getting sour pasteurized milk rots, hence the wretched smell from the spilled crud in the back of your refrigerator.
So to make crème fraîche in your kitchen we need to get some new bacteria, stat. And just as when we fermented some carrots a couple of weeks ago, the name of the game is letting the good bacteria crowd out the bad ones, and cultured buttermilk has the good guys aplenty.
You’ll need a bowl, a spoon, a cup or so of full-fat (35% or more) cream, some cultured buttermilk, and some plastic wrap.
Pour your cream into the bowl.
Pour in about a couple of tablespoons (give or take) of buttermilk. A little more will make it go a little faster, but don’t dirty your measuring spoons.
Give it a gentle stir. Cover the bowl with plastic wrap, place it in a warm spot in your kitchen, and wait.
Don’t stare at it, it won’t work any faster (I tried).
If you take a peek in the bowl in about 10-12 hours you’ll notice some little bubbles forming. This is good.
In another 10-12 hours it will look like it is separating a bit around the edges. It may also seem more like a lump than a liquid, and the whole thing will shift if you move the bowl. This is what you’re looking for.
Give it a stir and make sure to chuck it in the fridge so it firms up like this. And guess what? You’ve made crème fraîche!
(Now, depending on your kitchen temperature the 10-12 hour guidelines may be too long or too short. The warmer it is the faster it goes. Smell, taste, and use the visual cues more than the clock. If it smells like barf start again.)
You’ve essentially made yogurt but with full-fat cream. It’s like sour cream on steroids. You can add sugar and make it sweet, use it to enrich a sauce or soup (it won’t split under heat!), bake with it, and give some to your neighbour doing keto - they will love you! Crème fraîche is the richness of cream with the tang of fermentation. I could give you a thousand suggestions for using it, but I’m betting you can come up with plenty on your own. Eating it with a spoon is encouraged.
And you can find a way to use up that buttermilk, can’t you? Replace the regular milk with buttermilk in your favourite pancakes, muffins, cake, etc. I’ve been known to drink it straight up, but don’t @ me about it.
You might be squeamish about leaving dairy out at room temp, and I get that. If you’ve ever taken a gulp from a questionable carton in the fridge (and who can honestly say they haven’t?) it’s a pretty vomit-worthy experience. But the point here is that we are letting the cream go “off”, but with the right microbes winning the war, not the sketchy bacteria creeping off the old takeout containers.
So rather than get hosed on a tiny tub of fancy dairy, make it yourself and have it in your fridge always. Nice things need not be a luxury, and everyday is a good excuse to make something delicious.